There’s something in the air this spring. Talking-animal movies, so often seen as the domain of kids and kids alone, are seeping into the adult mainstream. In March, it was Pixar’s Hoppers—an animated film about a human who uploads her consciousness into a lifelike animal robot—which was covered in The New Yorker and featured the voices of Jon Hamm, Meryl Streep, Bobby Moynihan, and more. Now it’s The Sheep Detectives, which got a rave review in The New York Times and at least one Vogue editor found it to be the hottest ticket in town when it opened last weekend.
The Sheep Detectives boasts a similarly star-studded cast to Hoppers, though in this case, some performers (Hugh Jackman, Emma Thompson, Hong Chau) retain their human form. But their fleecy companions are voiced by Julia Louis-Dreyfus as the smartest sheep, Lily; Bella Ramsey as Zora, who is full of questions (not least of which: What’s the point of human life if it could all end tomorrow?); Bryan Cranston as Sebastian the loner; Patrick Stewart as the dignified Sir Richfield; Regina Hall as the fluffy, gorgeous, deservedly diva-like Cloud; Chris O’Dowd as Mopple (who is the only one who remembers things); and Brett Goldstein as rowdy twin rams Ronnie and Reggie.
If you haven’t yet heard, The Sheep Detectives (a passion project directed by Kyle Balda and written by Craig Mazin) tells the story of a flock of Agatha Christie–style mystery-loving sheep, who set out to solve the murder of their shepherd (Jackman). Even in the positively weird setting of a weekday matinee, I found myself both laughing and on the verge of tears. This is all to say: Animal movies seem to be firmly becoming the province of award-winning actors, top comedic talents, and seasoned legends of the stage.
So we thought, Who should voice some of the internet’s other favorite (non-animated) animals of late? Without further ado—in a bit of slightly unhinged fare for your week—here is our dream casting for the next strangely poignant animal movie.
Chonkers
Photo: Getty Images
Chonkers, the “food-motivated” 2,000-pound male Steller sea lion who went viral in April for making a temporary home out of Pier 39 in San Francisco, has a certain regality to him. I’d vote J.K. Simmons, Jack Black, or Robert De Niro.
Moo Deng
Photo: Getty Images
The internet moves on fast, but who could forget the beloved Moo Deng, the delightfully slippery and chaotic pygmy hippopotamus who lives at a zoo in Thailand? Her name translates to “bouncy pork,” and she could easily bounce back into our hearts on the silver screen. But who to play her? One thought: Bowen Yang, whose admirable portrayal of Moo Deng on Saturday Night Live showed that he’s not afraid to get wet.
Punch the Monkey
Photo: Getty Images
Punch the Monkey, a baby Japanese macaque, went viral in February for seeking comfort in an orangutan stuffed animal after being attacked by his fellow monkeys. SNL loves a viral animal, and Marcello Hernandez captured hearts with his portrayal of Punch (alongside Sarah Sherman as his mother who abandoned him). More recently, Punch has been seen getting cozy with some of the other monkeys. A narrative arc! The script writes itself. Whomever might play Punch in the hypothetical movie needs to show the emotional vulnerability and the humor at play…. Elijah Wood comes to mind. Or Andy Samberg!
